Saturday 24 November 2007

Time to move on.

Ok the new site is up and I've changed my name by deed pole. The finishing touches are nearly done and the first couple of posts are up.

So....... without further ado let me please introduce to you, despite what Blackadder said there is no-one madder than, Mad JackMcMad.

b3n is dead, Long Live Jack!!!

Tuesday 13 November 2007

Apologies and New Details

How are yiz all?

First off major apologies for the lack of communication lately. A severe dose of Bloggers Block coupled with a very hectic work schedule prevented me from doing any posting, commenting etc but I have been reading, slyly in the background!

Now to business, I have decided to kill off Bertie (of Third Nipple not of Ahern, although we can still wish). I felt that it was going nowhere and I also wanted to distance myself from the other two nipples that are still attached to the lying toe rag that is our glorious leader. But, and it's a big but, I will rematerialize very soon comme le papillon from his pupa, born anew and under a different name.

I've opened new blog on wordpress but haven't posted anything yet. Over the next couple of weeks I'll be finalising the layout, themes etc and then will start posting.

Somethings to look forward to in the new blog will be podcasts with Mandonkey, Giblets and Gorf entitled '4 Men and a Bottle' (as soon as I can get my recording gear in order that is), a silly song or two from your's truly and other general rantings.

I will update this site with the new link when I'm ready to launch so until then, many thanks to all of Berties 3rd Nipple's regular readers, commenters etc in particular, Grandad (best of luck with the awards, I voted for you many times), Grannymar,K8 and Baino. I hope you will all join me over on wordpress soon.

Friday 7 September 2007


I've blogged before about how I ended up buying the house that my paternal Grandmother was born in without knowing it, (those of you who haven't read about it can do so here) so it's probably about time I blogged a bit about her, my Grandmother.
A tall, elegant eighty nine year old lady with a hearty laugh and a razor sharp wit that not even a couple of recent strokes could dull, she has visited the house of her birth on a few occasions and I loved listening to her reminisce about my great grandparents as she pointed to the various locations around the house where each humourous incident occurred.
One of the hardest things that I ever saw my Granny having to cope with was the death of her eldest son nine years ago, my uncle Podger, a very acomplished musician who, during the course of his long musical career played with many famous bands including The Rolling Stones and Gladys Knight and the Pips but was probably most famous for his years on the Showband scene in Las Vegas in the 1960s and 70s.
The respect that was afforded to my Grandmother at Podger's funeral by people such as the Dubliners and Paddy Cole was astounding and it was as I was helping her into the funeral car and Joe Dolan came over to help me with her that I realised that this lady was very special.
Always fond of family get togethers, sing songs and what not, her favourite singer was Pavorotti, who passed away yesterday 6th Sept at 4am. I'd love to kow how she felt about that but I never will because forty two minutes later she too passed away. At least she had good company for her onward journey.

Monday 3 September 2007

Curiosity Killed the Cat?

Not this time, it was a mad Australian woman! The aptly named Kat Kessing (honest to Jaysus, you couldn't make this stuff up), a childrens author from near Alice Springs (beware of what you let your kids read folks) has been roaming the Outback catching, killing, cooking and eating feral cats and has now produced a recipe book stuffed full of moggy masterpieces.
However, her plans to introduce the feline cuisine at an Outback food contest turned into a bit of a cat-astrophe when the tasting judges couldn't keep the cat meat down. Pussies!!
For anyone interested in experimenting, her recipe for a Stewed Cat-erole is:
Chop and Brown 2 small feral cats on a pan. Add a couple of dashes of LemonGrass, Salt, Pepper, Wild Peach, Spinach Leaves and Mistletoe berries and water. Cook on a high heat for 5 hours. Now if that don't get the taste buds goin' I don't know what will. Here puss, puss, puss!!

Friday 31 August 2007

Stop sniffling, there's no more coke and that's it!

There’s been something in the news in the last couple of days that has rightly pissed me off. Coca Cola are closing their plant in Drogheda with the loss of more than 250 jobs. Wha.. de..!?!
Has there been a huge downturn in worldwide sales? Are they on the brink of bankruptcy? Has Pepsi stolen their secret formula and are they holding it to ransom? Are they fuck?!?!
In all probability what’s actually happened is that some bean counter or other in Atlanta head office has got promoted and in order to impress his new bosses with his business savoir faire has, with one stroke of a pen, consigned 250 hard working people to next year’s unemployment statistics. It sickens my hole!
Of course you know who I blame? All of the local organisations in Drogheda that ever begged Coca Cola for sponsorship for what ever event they were holding, be it the Knitathon or the Puddle Jumping Championships when all Coke wanted to do was to repatriate all of their hard earned profits.
Damn you ‘Lourdes Brass Band', damn you ‘Droichead Arts Centre’ and damn you ‘Drogheda and District Bridge Congress’ you should ALL be ashamed of yourselves!